Attachment to the wanting as well as the goal

Dreaming can be delicious, all the possibilities and potential are there at your fingertips to pick and choose and switch out in day dreams.  That’s how I’ve felt about treasure hunting in Florida – maybe I’ll find emeralds, maybe silver coins, maybe a gold box full of jewels (someone really did find one of those!).  Now after about three years of imagining what might happen, I’m going to find out and while that’s exciting, there’s a certain sense of loss to it too.  I don’t feel ready, haven’t honed my metal detecting skills, etc.  And there’s that knowing that I’ll need to find new daydreams on the other end which is fun too, but I get attached to my old standbys.  That’s been a big part of this past week, both treasure hunting and art sales – another ‘what will happen’ adventure.

I’ve put some time into studying what I need to do and how to go about doing it most efficiently.  Now that I know I’ll be doing a jewelry sale at the end of November, reality is setting in on what I need to get done before then so there is going to be considerable time spent out in the garage with the torch including today.  I dug out some fabric to make a cover for the folding table and things like that. I’ve also started cleaning out my email inbox by getting rid of some of the automated messages that I always delete without reading.  It’s a pain because I had to go find my logins for each but now I’m getting slightly less mail to have to sort through.

Overall, it’s felt like a slow week; hard to get started in the morning and things like that but I think it’s really that I’ve been thinking through all these different ventures.  I’ve put a little bit of time into getting the yard ready for winter, too – taking in the hoses, cleaning out the flowerpots and things like that. It’s not much fun, but things do look better!

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