Letting go of what isn’t working

I was checking out other blogs this weekend and found myself relating with some chagrin to the latest post on Zen Habits, Productivity tips for people that hate GTD.  The chagrin was due to having recently re-added my tattered copy of Getting Things Done to my to-do pile because not much of it stuck from the last time I tried to follow it.  So this article got me to thinking about all the times we use precious hours trying to get something to work for us that simply isn’t a good fit.  Morning pages don’t work for me either (see Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way.)  I know they work for others, but after three months all I got was notebooks full of nothing.  I think maybe the obvious non-working things are easier to stop doing, but how often have you seen an author address the need for more time by saying “just get up a half hour earlier in the morning” as if theirs is the only advice/exercise/task you are trying to follow.  Pretty soon you’re getting up two hours earlier, and not seeing results because you are now critically deprived of sleep, which you probably were already if you’re like the majority of the population. Maybe it’s time to pursue only the things that add the most value.

As a reminder of what’s important, I have an ideal day schedule posted on the wall behind my desk.  This is simply how I would love to spend an ordinary, everyday kind of day.  What surprised me when I put my thoughts to paper is that without keeping track, everything added up to between 23 and 25 hours a day – guess my subconscious was trying to tell me something;-)

My ideal day looks like:

• 1.5 hours meditation and visualization
• 2 hours physical activity
• 2.5 hours cooking & dining
• 2 hours with family and friends
• 6 or 7 seven hours working
• 1 hour chores
• 8 hours sleep

My real day doesn’t look like this – yet. But living a life where this schedule is a normal day represents success to me, not how much gets done. I have to ask myself if GTD or other things in that to-do pile are aiding or detracting from living this ideal day? And much as I hate to admit it the answer is detracting. I think I’ll stick with the parts that stuck with me from the first time I tried it (I have a bill paying folder and a basket for stuff I need to deal with) and leave it at that.  A new pasta recipe and an after-dinner walk are going to do more to move me towards my real goals.

Technorati Tags: achieving goals, getting organized, getting things done, ideal day, letting go, routine, time management

5 Things you can do now to reclaim your weekends

It’s easy to fall into the trap where Saturday and Sunday are catch-up days for what didn’t get done the rest of the week. But does that really give you the mental break and relaxation you need or does it just heap on the guilt for not getting it all done as you vacuum while staring out at the sunny blue sky?  There’s no one size fits all solution and you may have to sacrifice some “I should’s”  but you can keep your weekends for the other areas of your life that need your presence too.  Here are 5 simple, not necessarily easy, things you can do to get your weekend time back.

1. Divide up the routine chores among family members and among the weekdays.  Have a dedicated chore hour every night when everyone chips in and maybe even put on some great dance music.  For example, clean the bathroom on Monday night, change the sheets Tuesday night, grocery shop on Wednesday etc.
2. Stay in on Friday night and get ready for the week ahead (clothes, frozen lunches, etc.) Use that as your wind-down time from the work week.  That way you won’t sleep Saturday away and won’t have Monday’s demands eating into your time on Sunday.
3. Limit your kids’ sports and club activities to one each.  They’ll still get into college and it’s been shown that boredom can be good for kids.  If the adults in the house are hyperactive joiners; cut back there too.
4. Have some potential ideas worked out for what you want to do with all this free time. Have a tentative plan for a sunny day, rainy day, stay at home day etc. That way if your first choice isn’t quite so appealing because it’s pouring out, you won’t waste the day wandering around wondering what to do.  If you need supplies for a craft project or something, do that shopping earlier in the week. Don’t forget to leave a little free time for just enjoying the moment.
5. Lower your standards on housework, lawn and garden.  Turn your back on Martha Stewart and settle for good enough in these areas.  Your soul needs feeding even more than the lawn and if it’s an inch or two longer than the neighbors’, you’ll be giving them a chance to feel superior;-)

Technorati Tags: getting things done, relaxation, routine, time management

5 tips for spring cleaning your mind

There’s something about spring cleaning that gives a fresh perspective to a familiar room; maybe it’s just reacquainting yourself with the details that aren’t so apparent day to day. The same is true for all those internal thoughts and plans.  Here are five relatively simple things you can do to clean out the mental cobwebs.

1. Throw away or give away all those half-finished projects; those things that you started or set aside materials for more than six months ago but that you haven’t touched in the last 60 days.  Really be honest about the likelihood and your desire to finish them.  If they don’t make that cut give them to someone that will find value in finishing it or just get rid of it and cross it off the list.  You’ll free up physical space, mental space, and lose some guilt as well.
2. Update your to-do list, goals and risk lists. Gather any and all paper and electronic lists and go over them with an open mind. Check off the things that have been done, remove things that are no longer pertinent (it’s ok to let go of a goal not yet accomplished if it’s no longer a dream.)  And add anything new that’s come up.  Also, if you’re a habitual list maker think about consolidating lists so there aren’t so many to keep track of.
3. Clear the air with other people.  If something has been bugging you, even if it goes back to your childhood, bring it up with that person in a non-confrontational way.  Even if it doesn’t completely mend the hurt feelings, finding out why they said or did what they did will free you up from wondering and speculating.  It’s amazing how many hurtful things get said when someone simply isn’t feeling well; finding that out helps put it in better perspective.
4. Let go of any fears about money, kids, grades, whatever for one week.  You can pick them back up after seven days if you really want to.  And turn off the TV and radio for the same week; yes, really.  If something really dire happens, someone will tell you.  Then see what comes to fill this sudden void.
5. Rearrange your environment and your routine. This doesn’t have to be drastic unless you want it to be.  Just try moving pictures around to different walls than they were on before. Go for a walk or run in the neighborhood instead of the gym, take the headphones off on the bus, eat breakfast in the living room.  Switch it up a bit.

Technorati Tags: achieving goals, difficult conversations, fear, reflection, routine, spring cleaning

Celebrate the Vernal Equinox

Spring comes to the northern hemisphere this weekend (March 20th).  For those of you that don’t keep track, the equinox is when there is an equal amount of daylight and darkness.  From the equinox to the summer solstice (June 21st) the days will get longer and longer, by just a handful of seconds each day.

It’s Nature’s perfect example of making great strides in small steps.  So pick something that you really want to do more of like reading to your kids, walking in the neighborhood, or emailing your friends and follow the sun. Add just a tiny bit each day; one more paragraph, one more page, one more house on the next block.  In just three months you may not recognize how far you’ve come until you compare it against where you started… and then it will be Summer.

Technorati Tags: achieving goals, baby steps, relationships, routine, setting goals, time management

The value of adding joy to the everyday moments

It’s funny how people tend to focus on the big moments and events in life as being the most joyful; things like graduation,weddings, etc.  And these should be joyful occasions, but they aren’t nearly frequent enough to live on joyfully.  It’s the small everyday things where a drop of pleasure repeated will multiply and stretch to last.

Here’s a simple way to start adding more joy into the everyday moments. Start by looking at your daily routine for the tasks and moments that you repeat so often that they are almost unconscious.  Things like brushing your teeth or grabbing that first cup of coffee.  Pick one and then think about ways to bring more pleasure and joy to that moment, using all five senses.  For example, are the coffee cups in your cupboard there out of convenience (free, cheap, gifts) or is each one truly a representation of the perfect coffee cup?  The right shape, color, thinness, to suit your mood on a given day?  If not, start weeding out the ones that are simply functional and begin a quest for mugs that feel, look, and taste the way you want them too; bringing just a little more joy into your day, everyday. There’s no time limit and no rules. Enjoy the process of bringing beauty and pleasure into your surroundings in small, inexpensive ways that don’t add clutter or simply more ‘stuff’.

And yes, even brushing your teeth can be brought to a new level – try different toothpastes until you find one you really like the taste of (comparatively anyway!)  Look for toothbrush holders that make you smile or get one of those faucet attachments with LED lights that makes the water look colored.  (Brushed Chrome Colored Faucet Light Heat Sensitive Color Changing)

If you keep with this, gradually improving your experience with your daily routine it won’t be all that long before moving through the day feels a bit easier and lighter.

Technorati Tags: abundance, design your life, everyday moments, loving yourself, routine, simple joys