The No Excuses Project: ‘It will require too much risk’
December 16, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under No Excuses Project
Most everything in live worth having requires at least a little risk. Some things are easier to lead up to than others and this excuse is about the big things that require a massive leap of faith. What if you had lived in Ohio your entire life but always dreamed of living in Paris? You could mitigate the risk by taking French lessons and saving up and taking a vacation there but to truly realize the dream at some point you have to put an ocean between everything familiar and what you think you want.
The goal certainly doesn’t have to be Paris, it could be starting a business or learning to rock climb. The excuse comes in when we stop ourselves from going after it. Absolutely look for the things that can be done to remove some risk, physical, financial or emotional but then you have to ask yourself what the risk is of not doing it. What do you stand to lose? Dreams count.
I know I’ve used this excuse when I wanted something that seemed out of reach and nobody in my immediate circle wanted it for themselves or knew anything about it. That tends to heighten the perceived risk because it feels like there’s no net. The truth is there really never is a net because everyone’s experience is different. That doesn’t mean you head off to the mountains without the appropriate safety gear! It just means that we all perceive risk differently and have different goals attached to overcoming it.
Next week: ‘My perception is skewed and I don’t trust my own judgment’
The No Excuses Project: ‘I’ll compromise because I’m not confident enough to fully commit’
November 11, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under No Excuses Project
This past week’s excuse is one that I’m more guilty of than most, which is why it’s so awkwardly worded. I once got stuck getting on an escalator in London (they move faster over there!) with a suitcase so that I was hopping on the escalator with one foot and the other was still on the platform. I couldn’t get any leverage over my balance to either get both feet on or off the escalator. A passing gallant gentleman had to rescue me by pulling me back. I find myself doing that metaphorically in risky projects; compromising on how many or what risks I take so that I end up making an effort but not any progress.
I have seen it in others who have convinced themselves that they have to double their salary with their after work endeavors before they can justify leaving their day job. Most everyone that has made that leap had to go downhill on the income before they could head up the other hill. The problem is nobody can say when the time is right for you, and most of us can’t see it for ourselves either.
I think the only preventative measure for this kind of excusing behavior is just to be aware of it. Ask yourself if you are holding back so that it will be safe to turn back or if you are being taking enough smart risks. Where are you with that big goal? If you can turn back to life exactly as you left it before you started than you probably haven’t given it enough of yourself. Failure does happen as do unmet expectations but if you’ve really pursued the goal with everything you have these tend to manifest as something new and different in your life, not a return to something even more disappointing.
Next week: ‘I don’t have any experience’
The No Excuses Project “I’m not strong enough”
November 4, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under No Excuses Project
As excuses go, this one is pretty weak (no pun intended) and I think is most often said internally. Externally, it’s just whining – like kids saying they just can’t get the hang of mowing the lawn. But when we tell ourselves that we don’t have what it takes either in physical or mental fortitude, there’s a part of us that really means it and that doubt is crippling. While I have no scientific evidence to quote I think women fall victim to doubting their own strength far more than men – testosterone has been shown to be linked to confidence in risk taking.
When it comes to physical strength, we are not all created equal and most of us are not only not ready to tackle Everest but have no real desire to do so which means there’s little incentive to start training for it. But what about some other goal? I’ve always thought it would be cool to hike the Olympic National Park from the North to West boundaries – a 3-5 day trip through the back country of interlocking deer trails. There are a number of reasons why I haven’t made any progress towards this and one of them is I don’t think I could physically pull off walking that far with a full pack. But at the same time that’s not an impossible level of fitness, even for me:-) I’ve just let the excuse stop me before I even start solving the other problems like who else would be willing to go along.
Most of us can’t escape testing our mental strength at some point – accidents and disasters happen without warning and most of us discover that we had more in reserve than we ever thought possible. And yet still, when it comes to something like risking your life savings to start a business, we balk. Caution and a good business plan are certainly called for, but if what is stopping you is the thought that you aren’t strong enough to handle it, or deal with the potential failure, that’s a problem. If you make a list of everything that you have been strong enough to handle, I’m guessing the excuse just won’t measure up.
Next week: ‘I’ll compromise because I’m not confident enough to fully commit’
Lots of new things to learn
October 30, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under Juliet's Journal
I think my brain is starting to hurt from all the new things I’ve taken in this last week. On the plus side I finally got my merchant application in so that I’ll be able to process credit and debit cards at shows – it will be a miracle if it goes smoothly because neither I nor the bank representative knew how to fill out the form; it was a myriad of new vocabulary that wasn’t explained anywhere. Luckily, I’m fairly certain they want my business so it should come out all right in the end. Also in preparation for the upcoming craft show I was dropping things off in parts of the city I’ve never been to before and which Google maps was also unfamiliar with (as in the directions were wrong!) Now that that’s done, I can concentrate on actually making the jewelry to sell which is starting to get urgent.
My education has also included reading case files and meeting people for my volunteer case which is good to get started but has left me with a few nightmares, not to mention pondering the state of our society. I try to stay focused on there being far more people that try to stop the abuse than that actually commit the abuse. I’m glad there are people that want to be in law enforcement, but for me personally, reading their reports is hard enough – things can get a bit graphic.
To counteract the bad taste from dealing with that stuff, I went and found a recipe for pumpkin pancakes which make for a truly amazing comfort dinner when paired with maple syrup, home-made cranberry sauce and a glass of red wine:-)
And lastly with some trepidation, I decided to take a risk and see if a website profiling the ’soulmate’ predicted for my by a psychic would make any difference at all to my love life, the one area that I’ve been neglecting for some pretty common excuses. I can’t decide if I’m more nervous that nothing will happen or that something will. A lot of ‘what if’s’ have floated through my mind in the last week on this one, but I’m sticking with the premise than when you don’t know where to start, doing the first thing to come to mind that sticks there is a the right place. That doesn’t mean that I’m not still too worried about what people will think;-) Past time to start letting that kind of mentality go. You can check it out at http://insearchofedmondsguy.com
Where are you on the global scale of “everyone”?
October 22, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under Pursuit of Happiness
Not that long ago I got randomly selected to be on a survey panel from my gas company. So every now and then I answer some online questions and get Amazon points in return. For the most part they are pretty innocuous questions about appliances and light bulbs but one time it was to preview energy conservation service announcements. I got seriously irked. Particularly at the one that said “everyone should turn down their thermostats to 70 degrees” as mine was set to 60! But it did get me to thinking that perhaps those of us that are conservative in whatever behavior hear these messages and feel that we must dial it back even more. Whether it’s ‘be careful what personal information you put on the Internet’ or ‘everyone should save more’ it would be a good idea to figure out the range of ‘everyone’ before making changes to what you already do.
You should be careful on the Internet, but there’s a big difference between posting your social security number and letting people know that you are a die-hard fan of Big Bird (isn’t everyone?) Yes, that last could be slightly embarrassing in certain circles, but if you really are a die-hard fan, don’t you owe to yourself to be all that you are? If you’re holding back because of the potential damage to your personal brand, what about the potential gain? What if you become the go-to person for Big Bird fans around the world and get interviewed on Oprah, thus sending everyone to your blog so that you become the number one site on the web? It’s definitely not going to happen to the person that is worried about what people might think – either now or in 30 years.
Cautionary advice has its place, but not if you are so far over on the scale that you really need to be taking more risks.
Adventure and treasure hunting
October 6, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under Pursuit of Happiness
I was more into dinosaurs than pirates as a kid, but I’ve always loved a good treasure hunt (although not the kind where some adult already knows what and where…) So ever since I saw the Cash & Treasure episode about Spanish Armada gold on the Florida coast, I’ve been dying to go try my luck and that day has finally arrived, or will next week. I know that the odds are that my sister and I will come back empty handed, but the possibility exists for anything and everything to the right of that and it’s got me thinking about why adventure is so much fun.
A big part of it is that it’s not quantifiable. It would be virtually impossible to write a risk analysis or a business plan around treasure hunting. What would you say? Projected earnings are between $0 and $5,000,000? I think there’s a big relief for most people to get away from a plan for a bit, whether that’s with a metal detector or on a hike to a new spot looking for wildflowers. When you don’t know what could happen or what you’ll find, the entire journey is exciting.
By it’s very nature, adventure has a goal (gold and spices in the Far East) and a very hazy road map that quickly gets tossed away for inaccuracy. So how come when that happens in the other parts of our lives, we get resentful and start turning over rocks looking for that itemized list that will tell us how to get on? Most of us seem to want to be safe and adventurous all at the same time. However, outside of some theme parks I’ve never heard of that happening. That doesn’t mean I’m taking off for the beach forever, just that I know that the sense of possibility and excitement that comes with the thought of treasure is one that can come with any risk/goal combination we want to achieve. If you start with “I won’t find anything” and “it’s not worth trying” then it’s unlikely to fall out of the sky and hit you on the head.
The No Excuses Project: ‘I’m scared’
September 16, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under No Excuses Project
Hmm, fear. It’s hard to admit to and yet it controls so many of our actions. To complicate things there is more than one kind and varying degrees of each. Despite having been called fearless (nonsense!) I do get scared and I have let it control my actions. Some have thought I don’t because it rarely stops me in my tracks, but rather it causes me to hang on to the side like a kid learning to swim or to ice skate. If you don’t let yourself let go it ends up hampering your movements and you don’t make progress.
So here I am hanging on the side, trying to keep one foot in the safe zone while reaching for the impossible with the other. As excuses go, I’ve rarely heard myself or others actually say “I’m scared,” it usually comes out as ‘that’s for other (richer, thinner, fitter, younger, older) people’ or ‘I don’t have time’ or something similar. I made a lot of progress facing fears when I started in on keeping a risk list. That led me to conquer the fear of unknown protocols like shopping for makeup or perfume in fancy department stores. Those were the easier ones to identify because the fear was a little more obvious.
When I look at the goals in front of me I know that being scared is holding me back and yet it’s just one voice among the many other excuses. The best solution I have right now is to just to remember how I’ve conquered the smaller things, took one thing at a time, went slowly and with an open mind. Recuperating time after facing a big challenge is also important. Most workout routines recommend putting a day or two of rest between strength training, this is no different. I’ve made strides this week too – I’m now showing my jewelry in a gallery and moving ahead with art show planning. There’s no half way measures on that last one.
Next week: The timing isn’t right (I use this one a lot!)
Intuition vs common sense
August 7, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under Juliet's Journal
Some say that happiness is working through a challenge, not relaxing on the beach. And I admit to a certain state of bliss when working on a project as it goes from ignorance, confusion and chaos to something vaguely resembling the goal. That’s pretty much where I am now in my life project – still chaotic but beginning to take shape which is probably why I’m taking some pretty big financial risks to keep investing in the ‘project’ of me instead of being my usually fiscally responsible self and finding an outside job in addition. This week marked the first no going back on taking out financial reserves. Suze Orman and I are never going to see eye to eye but then I could never survive with just one pair of earrings. I know what convention would say I should do, but I can’t quite bring myself to pursue it, at least not this week!
As I’ve been working on the No Excuses Project, I’m beginning to see what a huge role excuses have played in putting ‘being safe’ in front of dreams. Sometime around high school I realized how much talk there was in my family of ’someday’ and exciting projects, trips, and businesses. None of which ever materialized and I vowed that I would not become that. I haven’t, but I’ve let it influence me just the same and have been somewhere more in the middle of that spectrum then where I truly want to be. Of course I could be entirely wrong and have some serious crow to eat in a year or so but…. I’d rather find that out for sure, I guess.
On a more tangible level, I’ve gotten prints made of my photography and gotten those posted on Etsy. Between clearing error messages on the temperamental printer I worked on going outside of my comfort zone when it comes to writing sales copy. I would much rather say ‘red hibiscus’ and leave it at that but I know better – still it’s struggle!
As soon as I finish one last necklace this morning, I’ll have the first batch of beach glass jewelry ready for photography. I picked up some sand and pebbles for props yesterday so hopefully I can get that done this weekend and the online shop setup quickly (more copy to write!) It’s taken a lot longer than I anticipated to get this far, as usual!
Balanced contrast
July 26, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under Visual Meditation of the Week
It’s hard to say whether the blue sea makes the ice and snow look whiter or if the white snow makes the sea look bluer. And does it really matter? It wouldn’t be half as beautiful without that level of contrast. Neutral colors are safe but unlikely to attract the people, activities, or progress into your life that you would like to see there. What can you shift from neutral to a saturated color, blinding white, or deepest black?
Somewhere over the north Atlantic, Juliet Chase, all rights reserved
The debate over doing what you love
May 26, 2009 by Juliet Chase
Filed under Pursuit of Happiness
There seems to be endless debate over whether doing what you love is a Cinderella-level of fantasy or not. The newly fledged entrepreneur’s story in a down economy like this one from CNN both laud those that take a chance and chant failure statistics like a bad Greek chorus in the background – 80% of new businesses don’t make it past the first year. It seems to be a popular topic with bloggers as well, probably because it’s something frequently on their minds as they try to see whether they can make it happen for themselves in a way that they can live with. How To Do What You Love Without Selling Your Soul doesn’t really answer the question it poses in the title and instead addresses how to market yourself without selling your soul which seems to boil down to finding a way to contribute – all well and good but I’d argue that you are in danger of making yourself more miserable by compromising the joy of your original inspiration as described in Maybe you can’t make money doing what you love. The caveat at the end of this last article though that sometimes if you just keep doing what you love the world shows up and decides to pay for it is what seems to describe the nonconformist photographer, Michael Kenna, who simply took the pictures he wanted to take until the world caught on while managing to pay his bills working for other people. Although he still stands out for taking pictures that are unfashionably beautiful and peaceful, I don’t think he’s had to worry about the light bill recently. To quote him, ” Life is about turning up. The more you get yourself out there, whether you wake up at 5:00 a.m. to pouring rain or not, the more you’re likely to experience the wonderful happenings that are going on all around you.” (read the Photographer’s Forum interview) Interestingly enough, I found his work when I was flipping through a magazine searching for pictures that I would wish I had taken (an exercise to find inspiration and learn from others.) While I respected many other’s work, his were the only ones that made me yearn for a higher level of skill.
I don’t believe that doing what you love for a living and for money is out of anyone’s reach, however the timeline is not altogether predictable. I think with people’s lack of confidence comes impatience, they show up once and when it doesn’t immediately work out they figure it was never meant to be and retreat to a safer but unhappy place. Why are we so focused on happiness or a career as a destination instead of a journey? Has anyone ever asked those 80% of out-of-business new businesses whether they regret starting it? Did the experience give them knowledge or inspiration for the next stage of their lives? Did they try again and do something different? Failure isn’t the end of the world, not showing up for life is.
